Tales of Destiny:2
by FireCat1
Summary: Tales of Destiny goes Austin Powers2. Its weird but funny nothing to bad, but ifyou know the movie you know how weird it is.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer, I don't own Tales of destiny 1 or 2, they belong to Namco. I also don't own Austin Powers2, that belongs to corporate executives and mike Myers.  
  
I just thought of this because of my randomness, I was thinking about watching Austin Powers2 or writing so, I'm like, 'Hey, Kyle is kinda like Stahn's mini-me.'. That gives you a hint of what's going to happen. Hehe.  
  
  
  
Tales of Destiny:2  
  
  
  
Somewhere in space*  
  
"We have a full go ground control, I, uh? What? Oh my gentle stars, uh, Huston, we have a problem."  
  
The astronaut of Space challenger 12 watched in horror as a space ship, shaped like an egg departed from a spaceport that looked like a 'Big Boy' restaurant. The space ship entered the planet's atmosphere somewhere around Seingald.  
  
Garr, International man of mystery, was cruising down the snowy streets of Phandaria in his jaguar car, called 'swinger'. His cars video screen began to beep and on came Hugo, head of the International spy institute.  
  
"Hello Hugo. What's the word in the spy biz?" He asked.  
  
"Hello Garr. How was your honey moon?"  
  
"Well, it turns out that Chelsea was a fembot all along." Garr looked slightly depressed, but put on a more confused look when Hugo said this.  
  
"Yes, sadly, we knew all along."  
  
There was a long silent pause.  
  
"Well, any ways, your schedualed to do a photo shoot. And one of the models works for Dr. Aileron."  
  
"Groovy baby! Shaguar!" And with that Garr went speeding off into the snow.  
  
Somewhere in Seattle*  
  
Dramatic thunder clap  
  
"Dr Aileron. Welcome back from outspace."  
  
Dr. Aileron looked over to his number 2 man, number2. Who also happened to be Karyl for those wondering.  
  
"Hello number2. And what is our evil world status as of now?"  
  
"We have invested in a Seattle based coffee company that sells premium quality coffee for affordable prices. Delicious." Number2 handed Dr. Aileron a cup of coffee and watched him sip it, getting some white foam on his nose.  
  
"Dr. Aileron, we could increase our profits five fold if we turn our ambitions away from evil enterprises and over to Starbucks coffee."  
  
"Number2, I make the rules here. And I demand a little respect!"  
  
"Um, Dr.? You have some of the coffee on your-"  
  
"SILENCE!"  
  
Number2 quickly shut his mouth and turned the other way as Dr. Aileron turned his chair.  
  
"Rutee K. Ver gatesder zinen?"  
  
"Zergutair Doctair."  
  
"How're things."  
  
"Fine, Mr. Drop me like a sack of potatoes so I can try and rule the world."  
  
Dr. Aileron choked on his coffee and muttered a few 'OKs' before turning back to number2.  
  
"Dr. Aileron, while you were up in space we began a process to clone you."  
  
"Cool. Dr. Aileron said, trying to sip his coffee with out getting it on himself. When Rutee screamed "Send in the clone" he spilled it into his lap and yowled in pain.  
  
"Ow, son of a gun. Get me a napkin someone."  
  
"Dr Aileron. He is everybit like you, except one-eighth your size.  
  
Dr. Aileron jumped up from his seat when he saw a tiny him standing in the doorway.  
  
"He's breathtaking. I shall call him.Mini-me."  
  
Dramatic thunderclap again*  
  
Mini me scampers over to Dr. Aileron and crawls into the seat next to him.  
  
"Hello mini me. Are you hungry? Do you want something? A hot pocket, an ego? No, no, we don't gnaw on out kitty, leave mini Mr. Dymlos alone."  
  
"Ahem. Stahn. Dr. A. The child has a name already."  
  
"Really?" Dr. Aileron inquired, turning to Rutee.  
  
"Yes. His name is Kyle."  
  
"Well, tough. I'm calling him mini me. Now, back to the mater at hand. I have heard rumors that my arch nemesis, Garr, is here in the 90's. I am going to go back in time and steel his mojo, rendering him helpless."  
  
"If you have a time machine, why don't you just go back and kill him when he's a baby or something."  
  
Dr. Aileron swirled his chair around to look at his test tube son, Leon.  
  
"How about no, Leon. Number2, unveil the time portal!"  
  
Karyl pulls on a cord and behind a curtain appears a strange looking swirl thing that must me the time machine.  
  
"Now, I'm going back in time to kill my nemesis, I bid you farewell."  
  
Dr, Aileron runs into the time machine, but falls down and rolls off the ramp. Mini me, or Kyle, stands up in his chair to look at him.  
  
"I'm ok, I'm ok. Its not turned on. Number2 could you, yeah thanks. Come mini me."  
  
Mini me/Kyle runs to Dr. Aileron's side and walks with him into the time portal that flings them back 10 years.  
  
The swirling of the time machine stopped and spat Dr. Aileron and mini me/Kyle into what appears to be a base of some sort. While they look around at the interior and take note of the heat a young man walks up to them.  
  
"Dr. Aileron. Welcome to the past, your volcano lair is up and running."  
  
"Ah, number2. You look so healthy and youthful."  
  
"Oh, doctor!"  
  
  
  
"And Rutee. You look so."  
  
  
  
Dr. Aileron looks at Rutee, who, besides outfit wise, has not changed one bit from her past self.  
  
"Riiiiiight."  
  
Dr. Aileron. I don't know how we can possibly steal Garr's mojo. He's very heavily guarded." Number2 interrupts.  
  
"Ah yes number2, but I have a secret weapon. A spy in the ministry of defense."  
  
"Really?" Rutee inquires.  
  
"Yes. He's known for his unusual love and mustard and his lethal temper. He always dresses in orange. His name, Fat mustard."  
  
  
  
Somewhere far away*  
  
"Listen up boys, I'm gonna sing you a lullaby." Fat Mustard, who looks like Clemente would if he were human, starts playing the bagpipes and knocks all the other guards out. He then takes out a drill and implants it in the ice that holds the frozen body of Garr, international Man of mystery.  
  
"Heehe, I got your mojo now."  
  
  
  
Somewhere in the future*  
  
"Oh? Oh no!!!"  
  
Garr pulls off the sheet covering him and a blond haired girl.  
  
"Whats wrong?" She asks.  
  
"Krike! I lost my mojo!"  
  
  
  
Back in the volcano lair of Dr Aileron.*  
  
"Well then, everything is going according to plan. Now nothing can stop us. Mwhahahaha. Mwahahaha. Mwahahahah."  
  
Everyone in the background starts to laugh diabolically while the image pulls out to reveal a desolate island in the middle of the Caribbean.  
  
________________________________________________________-  
  
Am I weird or what? But I thought it was ok. I always thought the Austin Powers movie were funny, a little sick at times, but funny. If you're wondering, Philia comes in later, and I'll find a part for Mary too. So, thank goodness for summer vacation right? All the time in the world to write, as long as your mother isn't on the computer. 


	2. Mojo matic

Disclaimer* I don't own Austin Powers or Tales of Destiny, someone else owns them.  
  
Yeah, I was thinking that this would be one of these stories that you write and never intend on finishing, a lot of people have stories like that, but I think I'm going to finish it, though I'm sure I'll totally put it in the wrong sequence.  
  
Mojo Matic  
  
Garr was walking with Hugo, the head of British Intelligence, discussing what to do about Dr. Aileron and his lost mojo.  
  
"You're in luck Garr." Hugo was saying. "We too have invented a time machine. Now you too can go back in time."  
  
"Groovy baby. I'll go back to the 60's, defeat Dr. Aileron, recharge my mojo and be back in time for tea. But wait a sec."  
  
Hugo looked at Garr intently.  
  
"Hugo, if I was frozen in 60's and thawed out in the 90's then presumably I can go visit my frozen self, but if I, oh no I've gone cross eyed."  
  
Hugo rolled his eyes as Garr was trying to stop looking at his nose.  
  
"I suggest you just enjoy yourself."  
  
"Alright Hugo, swinging 60's here I come! Move, move!" Garr waved some technicians who were still tuning up the small rainbow colored bug that was the time machine. Garr put his foot on what he though was the gas and plowed backwards into a dozen computers.  
  
"Sorry! I bet that was expensive."  
  
Garr tried again and nearly ran over a worker who was standing to the left of the car. When he had put the car in drive and straightened it out, he was ready. He waved one last time and stepped on the gas, sending him flying at a tremendous speed. The end of the lane was approaching quickly, but a white light soon enveloped the car and sent it to who knows where.  
  
"God speed Garr."  
  
Somewhere in the 60's*  
  
A white light flashes and a colorful bug car comes skidding into a party room. Garr stops to take in the site as the dancers get back to dancing, ignoring him.  
  
"I'm home!" Garr looked at himself in the mirror and straightened his hair. He stepped out of the car and looked at his old home. It was exactly how he remembered it. Nearby a group of girls were creaming at him with mirth.  
  
"Yes, I am home!"  
  
A strange girl approached Garr. Long red hair, light green dress. A girl that made Garr go 'Grr baby, very grr.'  
  
"Hello Mr. Kelvin. How do you do?"  
  
"I do fine and you, miss?"  
  
"Mary, Mary Argent."  
  
"Well, Miss Argent, do you wish to swing?"  
  
"I'd love too."  
  
Above Garr and the mysterious Mary a green haired gogo dancer was watching closely. She signaled for her partners to stop dancing and approached a fire pole. She slid down the fire pole and began to approach Garr, stopping every now and then to do small dance moves with a guy. Garr dropped Mary instantly when she approached.  
  
"Hello there baby. And how are you today?" Garr asked suavely.  
  
"You could start by buying me a drink." She said, making Garr gasp rather unbelievably.  
  
"Better play it cool, your friend works for Dr. Aileron." She whispered, hugging Garr.  
  
"And just who do you work for baby?" Garr asked, not noticing she had left.  
  
As he looked around Mary jumped up and took back his attention. Garr smiled and instantly forgot about his mysterious nameless companion.  
  
"Tell me Mr. Kelvin, do you swing?"  
  
"Are you kidding? I put the Grr in swinger, baby."  
  
"Well then, why don't you come right over here." Mary moved Garr around so his back was towards the entrance. He looked into Mary's eyes and noticed a reflection of a man in them, holding a knife. She winked and before a knife could go into his back, Garr pulled Mary in front of him.  
  
She gasped in pain as Garr dropped her to the floor, approaching the knife thrower.  
  
"You can't win Kelvin, use the machine gun!"  
  
Garr freaked out and grabbed Mary back up, using her as a shield from the machine gun bullets. When the man was out of bullets he dropped Mary again and approached him.  
  
"This isn't over, use the bazooka!"  
  
"No!" Garr screamed, trying to use Mary as a shield again.  
  
The two were thrown out of the window and were plummeting a couple of stories fast. Garr pulled Mary under him so that she would take the impact and not him. When they hit the ground the man looked out the window and scowled, seeing that Garr was still alive.  
  
"You can't win Kelvin!" Mary muttered, her face cut from the glass of the window.  
  
"Why wont you die!?" Garr yelled, very confused.  
  
When the man form the window began to shoot at them again Garr tried to take cover but didn't get much. Then a horn honked. The green haired girl from earlier pulled up with a car that was decorated as a safari car.  
  
"Need a lift?" She asked.  
  
Garr ran to the cars passenger side and jumped in head first, getting his head stuck in where your feet are supposed to go. He yelled at her to go and she speed off away from the scene.  
  
Garr straightened himself off and looked at his rescuer. She had long green hair in a braid and wore a strange outfit that made her look like a raver.  
  
"Garr Kelvin, I presume." She said, turning to him.  
  
"Kelvin by name, Kelvin by reputation." He said, trying to be suave.  
  
"Philia Felice, CIA, Felice by name, free lance by reputation."  
  
"Oh behave!" Garr yelled.  
  
"Not if I can help it!" The two laughed and then Garr made an 'ooh' noise at her.  
  
After a bit the two were driving along the English roads and chatting about nothing in particular.  
  
"You know what's amazing? How much England looks nothing like southern California."  
  
Philia nodded happily, ignoring the fairly stupid comment, then swerved when a bullet came whizzing through the windshield from behind.  
  
"We've got company, it looks like one of Dr. Aileron's assassins!" Philia drove the other car off the road and got out of the car with her pistol. Garr also took out his weapon.  
  
The man stood up and wobbled over to the two.  
  
"Do you remember me, Garr Kelvin?" He asked.  
  
"I don't remember your name, but your fez is familiar."  
  
"I am Buroke, and I am the one who will be killing you now!"  
  
The man lunged at Garr, but was immediately pulled into a headlock by Philia.  
  
"Who sent you?!" Demanded Garr.  
  
"I won't tell!"  
  
"Who sent you?!"  
  
"I'll never say!"  
  
"Who sent you?!"  
  
"Rrr, Dr. Aileron!" He said.  
  
"That was easy. Why did you tell us?" Philia asked, looking at Buroke.  
  
"I hate being asked the same question three times, its just so annoying."  
  
"I see, where's Dr. Aileron hiding?"  
  
"I won't tell!"  
  
Garr sighed. "Where's Dr. Aileron hiding?! Where's Dr. Aileron hiding!?"  
  
"Damn, three times! He's hiding in his secret volcano lair."  
  
"Where's Dr. Aileron's secret volcano lair?"  
  
"I'm not telling!"  
  
"Do I really have to ask you two more times?" Garr asked. "Fine, where's Dr. Aileron's secret volcano lair?"  
  
"I'll take it to the grave with me!"  
  
"Aha! He asked you three times, now you have to answer!" Philia cheered.  
  
"No, no no!" Buroke said, breaking free of Philia's headlock. "He asked 'do I really have to ask you one more time', that was a new question in a new line of questioning!"  
  
"Yeah, he's right. But I'm just trying to get information out of you, why are you being so slavish with the three question form is my question."  
  
"No, you are preaching to the-"  
  
Out of apparently no where a dart shoots Buroke in the neck, making him weak. He starts to stumble backwards, Garr still chattering on about nothing really. Buroke fell backwards down the cliff, while Garr and Philia just watched. They watched him try to stand up after he had finished falling. It looked like both his legs were broken.  
  
"I think you've finally met your match." Philia said, ignoring Boruke's dries for help.  
  
"Oh no, baby. I've defeated Dr. Aileron once before and I'll do it again." Garr said, approaching the car with Philia.  
  
"I was talking about me." Philia smiled coyly. Garr smiled happily as well.  
  
"Two of my assassins are dead, I will not tolerate failures!" Dr. Aileron was riding around the volcano lair in a bike while mini me/Kyle was sat on the handles, honking the horn at random people.  
  
Rutee smiled at them, then panicked when she fell backwards into number2 form some kind of earthquake.  
  
"What the heck was that?!" Number2 asked.  
  
"Volcanic eruption!" Rutee offered, trying to stand up straight.  
  
Off in the other direction, mini me/Kyle was trying to stay close to Dr.Aileron, but was sliding a whole lot more since he was so small. A man appeared at the doorway. A very large, fat man, dressed in an orange jump suit, like he was some kind of burger place server or a bad mechanic.  
  
"Ladies and gentle men, let me introduce you to my spy in the ministry of defense. Fat Mustard." Dr. Aileron smiled as Fat mustard saluted him.  
  
"First things first, where's your-"  
  
"Don't go there girlfriend!" Dr. Aileron silenced. "That is in no way charming."  
  
"Yeah, I'm no Brad Pitt. I have a crap on board that'll-"]  
  
"Ok, gross, stop, just stop! Really man, knock it off!" Dr. Aileron yelled. "Fat mustard, can I have my mojo now"  
  
"First things first, where's my money?" Fat Mustard waved a vile of pinkish liquid in front of Dr. Aileron.  
  
"Alright, give him the money."  
  
Mini me/Kyle dragged a brief case full of money over to Fat mustard and stood there as he looked at him with hungry eyes.  
  
"Geez, he's tiny. But wait, he kinda looks like a baby." Suddenly Fat mustard crouched down next to mini me/Kyle. "Come here, I'm gonna eat you! I'm bigger than you, I'm higher in the food chain! Get in my belly get in my belly"  
  
Mini me/Kyle looked at Dr. Aileron who nodded to him. Mini me/Kyle kicked Fat Mustard in the shins and grabbed the mojo from him. He ran up to Dr. Aileron and gave him the vile.  
  
"Thank you. Can I have a hug?" Dr. Aileron crouched down and gave mini me/Kyle a big hug.  
  
"Dr. Aileron, I have a new proposition. You keep your money, get your mojo, and I get your baby." Fat mustard licked his lips, making mini me/Kyle hide behind his back.  
  
"Riiiiiiiiiight."  
  
"Excuse me." Number2 interrupted Fat mustard.  
  
"I want my baby back, baby back, ribs. I want my baby back, baby back ribs. Chili's baby back ribs." Fat Mustard sang as Number2 looked to Dr. Aileron.  
  
"Dr. Aileron, now that we have Garr's mojo, what do we do?"  
  
"Garr is no longer my problem any more, if you find him, kill him."  
  
Dr. Aileron looked at the vile in his hand that contained the oink liquid. He unscrewed the cap and looked at it, uncertain. He looked to Number2 and Rutee, who smiled reassuringly.  
  
Dr. Aileron cautiously took a sip of the pink mojo. Suddenly the room became fuzzy and red. He looked over to Rutee, who looked more appealing than ever.  
  
It was apparent to Rutee Dr. Aileron was staring at her, smiling. She wasn't quite sure what he was thinking, but she smiled back.  
  
Dr. Aileron clapped his hands. "Your dismissed everyone. Its private time."  
  
As everyone left mini me/Kyle rolled his eyes as Dr. Aileron and Rutee sat down on bed that had risen from the floor.  
  
"Dr. Aileron looked at Rutee, who looked back intently. Dr. Aileron pulled out a bottle of whiskey and took a long sip of it. He dropped the bottle to his side and looked back at Rutee. She grabbed his shoulders and laid him down on the bed. She whispered something to him in another language, then they both fell onto the bed, in oblivion of love.  
  
*The volcano erupts from the supposed force of their love.  
  
Chapter 2, complete! Sorry, dentist appointments cut into it, then when I worked on it and finished my cousin broke the computer so it froze and I couldn't save my work. Don't you hate it when somebody breaks your stuff!? Man, but here it is, and it came out better than I thought. Whew, no I just have to make a special birthday story since mine is coming up. Yeah. Have fun. 


	3. Mongoose and snake

Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Destiny 1 or 2. The characters, places etc. all belong to Namco.  
  
I've been gone for awhile, and I bet no one thought I would finish this, but I really want to, its such a cute story, at least I think so. Here it goes!  
  
  
  
Mongoose and snake  
  
Garr walked in the door to the cryogenic lab, which quickly closed behind him. He walked over to Philia and looked at her.  
  
"It seems that fat mustard used some kind of nerve gas, these men don't remember a thing. Captain, why not check fat mustards records with the mainframe at langly?" She suggested.  
  
"Yes ma'am." The captain saluted, before heading out the door.  
  
"Can I see that?" Garr asked a reporter, talking his camera away. He snapped photos of his frozen self in many different positions, cheering himself on. "And I'm spent." He said, tossing the camera back to the reporter.  
  
Philia laughed as Garr took her hands and led her out the door.  
  
"Come on Philia!"  
  
The two went skipping across a crosswalk and stopped at a clothes store. Philia came out with orange pants on, a brown shirt and a fuzzy white vest and boots on. Garr shook his head disapprovingly. Philia frowned and watched Garr smile.  
  
A moment later Garr come out of the store wearing the orange pants, brown shirt, fuzzy vest and fuzzy boots. Philia laughed when he began to pose.  
  
The two went on skipping until they were at a small café. They sat down and took in a breath.  
  
"So Garr, what's the future like?"  
  
"Well, everyone has a flying car, entire meals come in pill form and the world is ruled by damned dirty apes!"  
  
Philia paused and then muttered, "Oh my God."  
  
"Got ya! Had you for a second didn't I?"  
  
"You can have me for even longer if you want." Philia smiled.  
  
"Aha..come on Philia!"  
  
Garr pulled Philia to her feet and began to dance around her in a senseless fashion. Philia laughed as Garr attempted to be a tap dancer. When the song ended Philia gave Garr a kiss on the hand, who posed and sighed happily.  
  
*At Dr. Aileron's secret volcano lair.  
  
Dr. Aileron walks up behind Rutee, who is busy making herself a cup of coffee. She smiles slightly when she sees him.  
  
"So, uh, Rutee, how're things?"  
  
"Uh, fine, Dr."  
  
"Just taking a break? Try the hot pockets, they're breathtaking."  
  
There was a long pause before Rutee spoke. "You haven't called.."  
  
"It got weird, right? Listen, I can't let my feelings for you get in the way of me taking over the world, you know that."  
  
"I see.Dr, I..."  
  
Before Rutee could finish her sentence they looked to the time machine, which had sprung into life. In seconds the form of a punk Leon appeared in the frame.  
  
"Leon, son, what're you doing here?" Dr. Aileron asked, turning away from Rutee.  
  
"Well, you know, I was thinking that maybe we could work it out, you know? I mean, you are my father, right?"  
  
"Leon, you had your chance. I have some one who will take over the family interest when I die, he's evil he wants to take over the world and he fits easily in most overhead storage facilities."  
  
"Him?" Leon asked, looking at the mini me/Kyle who was sitting in Dr. Aileron's chair. "He'll kill me the first chance he gets!"  
  
"Yeah probably." Dr. Aileron shrugged. Mini me/Kyle smiled at Dr. Aileron, who proceeded to make hand symbols telling him he loved him. Leon rolled his eyes and walked off as mini me/Kyle signed back to Dr. Aileron.  
  
Garr pulled a photo out of the developing water and hung it with several others. He looked them over thoroughly, admiring his photography work. Then he noticed it.  
  
"What the-?"  
  
He pulled a picture down and put on a pair of glasses that could magnify the picture. He saw clearly that there was a drill mark in the ice that contained him.  
  
"That's how he stole my mojo! Fat mustard!"  
  
Garr decided he would tell Hugo tomorrow and went into the main room of his home. Philia was sitting on the bed, waiting for him.  
  
"So Garr. Why not give me one of your world famous massages."  
  
"Krike. You mean a sensual massage?" He asked, picking up a bottle of water. Philia nodded as Garr began to rub her shoulders gently. In a mere second Philia was turned around, staring straight into his eyes.  
  
"You don't have to play, we're way beyond that." Philia said.  
  
"W-we are?"  
  
Before Philia could reply Garr got up and grabbed his jacket.  
  
"Is it something I said?"  
  
"No, its not you. I can't explain it right now. Sorry."  
  
With that Garr walked out of his apartment, leaving Philia alone. But not for long. Hugo popped up in a monitor, asking for Garr.  
  
"I must have said something wrong, so he just took off."  
  
"Listen Philia, I don't want you getting to close to Garr, Its not meant to be." Hugo said.  
  
"I don't get to close to anyone Hugo. My interest in this case is purely business."  
  
"That's good to hear. In that case then, you won't mind tracking fat mustard down tonight?" Hugo inquired.  
  
"No problem." Philia said.  
  
"We need you to plant this homing device on him, by any means possible."  
  
"No problem."  
  
"Good. Now remember, any means possible."  
  
Garr stood, staring up at his past self, frozen in ice. He sighed.  
  
"Look at you, you used to be so handsome, now you're nothing. Well, at least it can't get any worse, can it?"  
  
Philia cringed hard as fat mustard leaned over to get a piece of chicken. She grimaced when she remembered she had to plant the homing device. She pulled it out of her purse and set it up to a beacon. She took a deep breath before she closed her eyes and planted the homing device on fat mustard.  
  
*At the lair.  
  
Dr. Aileron stood in front of his followers and cleared his throat.  
  
"Now, we are going into phase two of our evil plan, or is it phase three, oh I don't know, I don't know phases. But any ways, this is the phase where we put a giant 'laser' on the moon. As you know the moon does a full rotation around the planet like so.."  
  
Dr. Aileron pushed the small moon on the demonstration model, which only got half way there. The members of the audience waited for the moon to move. Dr. Aileron glared and pushed the moon the rest of the way around.  
  
"Now, it will be situated in a position in which it will be able to destroy the castle of seinegald. Turning the moon into what I like to call, a 'death star'."  
  
Dr. Aileron turned when he heard Leon laugh. "What is it?"  
  
"Oh nothing, Darth."  
  
"What did you call me?"  
  
"Oh no no nothing. Ah, ah, rip off!" Leon pretended to sneeze.  
  
"Bless you." Dr. Aileron said turning back to his model.  
  
"Now, the giant laser was created by the noted physicist Allen parsons. So we will there for call it the Allen Parsons project."  
  
Leon laughed again, louder this time.  
  
"Ok, what's the problem now?" Dr. Aileron started to get angry.  
  
"The Allen Parsons project is a progressive rock band in 1982, why don't you just call it operation wang chung?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"No that project banana ram will be huge though."  
  
"Ok Shh!"  
  
"But-"  
  
"Shh!"  
  
"But I-!"  
  
"Shh.com! Now silence!"  
  
"Dr. Aileron, setting aside the family squabble, maybe we could get down to business."  
  
"Oh really number two? You want to run things around here? You want to wear the daddy patch, huh? You gonna cry?"  
  
"Why would I cry?" Number two asked, right before Dr. Aileron hit him in the face with the ball image of the earth. Number two instantly pretended to cry, dealing with Dr. Aileron's childness wasn't one of his favorite things.  
  
When Dr. Aileron was sure number two was crying he did his little happy victory dance, throwing the ball, with which he hit number two with, back into its holder.  
  
Garr ran don the street looking for Philia. He found her looking at clothes outside a store.  
  
"Philia!" Garr yelled.  
  
"Philia looked at him and out the dress she was looking at down. "Uh, yes?"  
  
"Philia about what happened last night, I want to apologize! You see, I've lost my mojo." Garr sighed.  
  
"Is that it?!" Philia yelled. "I thought it was because you didn't like me!"  
  
"Oh no baby, you're alright, you're switched on, you're a bit of alright!" Garr said happily.  
  
"Oh good. Now, there's something I have to tell you something. Last night I planted a homing device on fat mustard, but in order to do that I had to-"  
  
"Hey! It's on!" Garr yelled, watching a red blob on the screen of the tracker. "Come on, let's go!" They both pulled out their guns and went running off.  
  
In a few minutes they were running down the halls of a subway station, trying to find fat mustard. They were followed by a team of headquarters detectives. They stopped in front of a bathroom, and Philia ordered a man to ram the door open. When the door fell down they all rushed in, but instantly gagged.  
  
"Oh my God! Fat mustard left a floater! In the name of all things sacred, that is the most fowl thing ever! Somebody flush it down!"  
  
"No no! We need to get this sample to the lab to be analyzed!" Philia yelled, moving aside for a detective to come in.  
  
After an hour Garr and Philia were sitting in a secret lab, waiting for the test results. As they were about to ask how much longer, Hugo walked in.  
  
"Hello Garr! Hello Philia."  
  
"Hello Hugo, so, what's up?" Garr asked, standing up.  
  
"Well Garr, we've found remains of a rare vegetable, only found on one island in the Caribbean."  
  
"Whoopdy doo! What does it all mean Hugo?"  
  
"It means, Garr, that Dr. Aileron's secret volcano lair is here, in the Caribbean!"  
  
"What ever." Garr said, rolling his eyes and sipping some coffee. Every one around him sweat dropped.  
  
*Back in Dr. Aileron's secret lair.  
  
Mini me/Kyle is sitting in Dr. Aileron's lap, smiling as he brushes his hair. Dr. Aileron stopped for a minute to look at him.  
  
"Rutee?"  
  
"Yes doctor?"  
  
"Is he growing or is it just me?"  
  
"Well, he is a real boy."  
  
"Oh? I thought he was a clone?"  
  
"Er, well, he uh-"  
  
"Never mind. Get me the king of Seinegald!"  
  
The king, along with several other high-ranking soldiers popped up on the screen in the lairs.  
  
"Ah, hello your majesty. In 12 hours I will prepare to destroy your kingdom, with my giant laser!"  
  
Dr. Aileron signaled number two to unveil the giant laser. When the king gave him a strange look Dr. Aileron turned around. He gagged and screamed.  
  
"Mini me! Stop humping the laser! Oh jeez. Why don't you and the giant laser get a room? Oh, never mind! King, you either pay me 100 billion dollars or I blow you up!"  
  
The king began to laugh.  
  
"Dr. Aileron, this is 1969, that amount of money doesn't even exist! That's like saying I want a million cagillion dollars!"  
  
"Come on King, show me the money!"  
  
"Show you what money?"  
  
"You know, show me the money, show me the money! You know?"  
  
Dr. Aileron heard someone trying to get his attention. He turned to Leon and waited.  
  
"Its 1969, that movie wont even come out for at least another ten years!"  
  
"Leon, daddies working, and when your in the lair try and use the big boy voice. Ok? King. Here is a demonstration of the awesome lethality of the laser! Fire the laser!"  
  
The king screamed as he watched the screen he was watching light up with fire from a laser, shooting at the castle. He yelled at one of his men for a damage report. The screen switched back to Dr. Aileron who was smiling very happily and evilly.  
  
"Its ok." One of his men said, bringing him back to the screen.  
  
"Dr. Aileron-"  
  
"Ok, talk to the hand cause the face doesn't want to hear it."  
  
"Talk to what hand, talk to your hand?"  
  
"Your not all that and a bag of potato chips."  
  
"Uh-"  
  
"Don't go there girlfriend. Uh huh."  
  
Leon leaned back in his chair and covered his face. "You're an idiot."  
  
"Ok, Mr. King. Bye bye."  
  
Number two switched the screen off and looked to Dr. Aileron.  
  
"Now, what do we do about Garr, sir?"  
  
"Garr is like the snake to my mongoose, or mongoose to my snake. I don't know animals very well. Now, Kill him."  
  
Almost done! Maybe one or two chapters left, don't know. I will complete it, no matter how long it takes, though it may take along time for me to get the next chapter up since school is back in session. But I will try my hardest! ToD rocks!!! 


End file.
